I can tuck mytits in my pants
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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