i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Randomize