Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
