Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Please don't give away my fajitas
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
