my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
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The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
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Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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