i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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