went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I have post one night stand depression
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