Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
