Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(330): View more from Ohio

Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.

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(770): View more from Georgia

if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?

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(517): View more from Michigan

He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes

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(734): View more from Michigan

and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?

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(410): View more from Maryland

You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.

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