I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
