I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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