I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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