this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
