Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize