Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
