Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
