I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize