He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
