i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
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