A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
