For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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