who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
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I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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