Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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