So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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