Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize