he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
