you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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