did you get engaged???
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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