There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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