girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
