You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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