Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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