just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
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It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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