This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
