Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize