I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
