My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
