look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize