i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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