Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
