don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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