If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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