I don't think brook has ever known best
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
