he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
