This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
