I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
