So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
