There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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