How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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