we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
