Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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