You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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