There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize